thawing the ice

i can't believe that i haven't written since january! that is both sad and embarassing. lots of stuff has been happening, none of it very condusive to writing - but that is something i really need to work on, and not only because of this venue.

i've been working, got a day job in customer service for a medical device company but havent freelanced since then - so i guess it's technically just a job and not a "day" job.

also, i started dating someone who is pretty amazing. who knew that could happen?

anywho - remember how excited i got over passing the winter soltice back in december? well imagine the glory i feel basking in the glow of an extra hour of daylight each day. that's right. the days are almost as long as they should be and spring is in the air. ahhhh. yes, i've been waiting.

i pulled my bike out of the shed last weekend, freshened up the air in the tires and stretched my legs for a bit. lisa met me in ewing and we drove up to washington's crossing and took the canal path for a bit. it was the first decent day in a while but the trail was still muddy and we rode through some snow in parts, which was cool. made me feel all rugged n shit.

now that the days are officially longer and the weather is warming, i'm just itching to be on the bike more often and have to make time for that... which brings me to my next point - this week i'm planning on commuting to work via pedal power. i absolutely hate the car commute, and my job is only 9 miles via backroads from my gf's apartment in hamilton - so i'm all about it. i'm a little nervous about it, but i think it's going to be good and i'm really excited to give it a shot. the commute is much further from ewing - just over 15 miles. which is actually do-able, but the route needs to be tested and timed.. and then there's always the prospect of getting home at night - being tired in the dark is only half the concern.. crappy or distracted drivers are the other half..

oh - also, one month ago i was in new orleans for fat tuesday. first of all, let me tell you that though the trip itself was amazing(!), here is not the forum for such expression. rather, i'm writing a few words about how i have not yet written any words regarding this. i plan a post later this week about nola bike-luv in all it's various forms. i just wanted to let you know that i haven't forgotten.

ok. i'm going to wish you all a happy spring - we've made it through yet another winter and it's time to thaw out, warm up, and get friggin going.

Gays: Let them have wedding cake!

Yesterday the New Jersey State Senate rejected a bill which would have extended marriage equality to same-sex couples. To say that I was disappointed is an understatement. This is an issue that strikes close to home for me, and it affects my family and many close friends in profound ways.

I’ve engaged in civilized debate with other Jerzians via comments on mutual friends Facebook pages, but have never said anything cohesive on the topic – at least since my community college days up in New York when I had to give a ten minute persuasive speech for my public speaking class and chose marriage equality as my preferred topic. I graduated with a 4.0 gpa. I digress.

While the defeat was expected, it has still stirred emotions in the form of deep frustration which bubble into anger like a pot brought to a rolling boil – like the soup I’ve been cooking all day. Again, I digress.

Shirley, you can’t be serious.

I am a constituent of Senator Shirley Turner. I wanted to call her office today to ask why she cast her vote the way she did, but considering that Trenton Times got a prepared statement back in their request for comment, I figured who would explain her actions to lil old me? Technically, I’m only a voter anyway.

“I believe in the definition of marriage as a legal union of a man and a woman as husband and wife,” said Turner in the statement.

I do not believe this traditional definition should apply moving forward. Certainly, you can look back 20 years, 200 years or 2000 years and might find marriage the same throughout this time – but slavery was also a tradition for a long period of this time, was that right? No. Clearly. There was also a time when women were burned at the stake or stoned to death in the street.

Not too terribly long ago wives were seen as the property of their husbands. Wasn’t a dowry negotiated between the father of the bride and groom because of the exchange of property which was taking place? This was also tradition. And what of the words 'bride' and 'groom' themselves? I think horses wear bridles, and the people who lead them from place to place with the bit in their mouths might be grooms.

Now Americans celebrate marriage as a union of mutual choice. Societies have the ability to discard tradition and should do so when it unfairly disenfranchises a minority.

“I believe my support for civil unions makes it clear that I support full civil rights for same-sex couples,” the senator’s statement continues.

Except that civil unions do not convey the same rights as marriage and they never will. I don’t mean the fuzzy ‘love’ stuff - and I don’t mean that the LGBT community is frustrated that they aren’t allowed to simply use the words of ‘marriage’ and ‘husband’ and ‘wife’ as it applies to their relationship with their partners. No, that’s not what this fight is about. It’s about the 1500 (if my recollection is correct, I don’t feel like looking it up right now) laws and rights bestowed by the federal government to which only married couples are entitled.

Things like taxes, health insurance and next-of-kin rights which are easily attainable by almost any two schmucks with opposite sexual organs but instead cost same-sex couples thousands upon thousands of dollars in attorney fees to draw up legal documents to produce the same affects. (And you better hope they’re air-tight should someone challenge you on the legality of your partnership.)

The rights of a marriage are recognized across state lines – oh wait, except for that pesky DOMA legislation from the 90's which clearly violates the ‘full faith and credit’ clause of the US Constitution.. but let’s ignore the existence of DOMA for a moment so that I may posit a hypothetical situation:

You reader, assuming you enjoy the intimate company of the opposite sex, and your spouse are on a cross-country road trip or are heading down from the latte-drinking liberal bastions of the northeast for a holiday in Florida, and get into a car accident in say, Kansas or South Carolina, and one of you winds up in the hospital… If you only have a civil-union and the health care working attending to you or your loved one chooses to challenge the legitimacy of your relationship – you or your spouse may be unable to make choices for each other and/or kicked out of the hospital room.

Of course, that would never happen to you because you’re both of the opposite sex. Could you imagine if you were asked to produce your marriage license or certificate before a doctor or nurse would confer with you about the status of your loved one or the treatment they would want to receive? It just doesn’t work that way for straight couples – your word and the appearance of bands on your right ring fingers need be the only proof.

Now imagine that you’re sitting at your same-sex partners’ bedside in an emergency room somewhere in over 40 states and try to comprehend the fear that the next person who pulls back the curtain can tell you to leave, just because they disagree with the simple fact of who you both are and whom you both choose to love. Unless you’ve been in that position, you cannot fathom what that fear might feel like. I wish Senator Turner could walk in these shoes.

Yes, at the moment there is still DOMA to contend with – but without a trend of victories on the state-level there will be no movement of the federal government.

So, no, Shirley – your support of civil unions does not speak for itself because a civil union will never convey the same rights as recognized with proper marriage. You can’t fix a civil union to do so – it’s a nice gesture, but it’s fundamentally broken.

Jesus was a liberal.

Senator Turner is a Baptist and her church is very anti-gay. She cites her religious faith as another reason why she cast her ‘Ney.’ I respect that people have their various beliefs. Such personal beliefs, even for non-believers, are like opinions and assholes – everyone has them. But that doesn’t mean that I should have to live by yours just as you should not have to live by mine. That’s the beauty I see in the First Amendment. Your freedom to practice your religion is my freedom from your religion. We are both equally entitled.

The legislation as proposed in New Jersey held an exemption for religious institutions. Read: your church or synagogue would not be forced to marry queers if it conflicts with your dogma.

But what’s more important, in my humble opinion, is three-fold:

1) Once marriage became an institution licensed by the state, it ceased to be valued in only religious terms. This is secular marriage. If two people are wed by a justice of the peace, it carries the same rights and recognitions as two people who also get that license and are married by a religious leader or figure. Conversely, if two people are wed in a church with no state license, it’s a beautiful commitment to each other and a promise made before their God, but it doesn’t mean squat to the government. Period.

2) Why in the world would a loving God, again assuming that you believe in that sort of thing, not value the commitment of two consenting adults? I will not get into the essence of my religious beliefs here (although you are free to communicate with me if you are curious or would like to engage in civilized conversation or debate) but I believe that Jesus was a liberal and would support marriage equality. Just as he would support universal health care – but that’s a post for another time.

3) Though it is not a phrase written in the Constitution, the ‘separation of church and state’ has been a guiding principle in the United States since the beginning of our great nation. I do not begrudge anyone their religious beliefs, but when your religious institution impacts my political and secular rights, it should cease to be entitled to tax-exempt status.

Civil Rights issues take courage.

In an article last month, it was claimed that Turner said that blacks have not yet achieved full equality.

What full equality is missing here? Turner is black and she serves in a position of great power in this state. The President of the United States of America is black and he’s arguably the leader of the free world. How do we gauge equality or lack-thereof? Where is the finish line?

Some people don’t think that the struggle for equality that people of color have engaged in can ever be compared to by the LGBT community. But I don’t like to play the “who has suffered more” game because the struggle for minority rights is not a contest. Nobody wins.

Some people have argued that a question of this importance should be put to the people of the great state of New Jersey (it would be a non-binding referendum, but act as a measuring stick for the legislature). I have a problem with this. You do not put civil rights issues to a majority-rule decision. If you had done that less than a hundred years ago, women would not have the right to vote. If you had done that in the 60's, Jim Crow would still be the law.

I do not believe that legislators should always vote as they please. They’re not our care-takers, they are our representatives. But it’s a fine line to walk, especially when the issue does not have any actual impact on opponents of marriage equality. If you don’t like gay marriage, then don’t get one. It’s as simple as that.

Never in our history, except prohibition which was later repealed, has work been done to contract rights and liberty. The move has always been made for expansion. It’s moments like this which are an opportunity for our legislators because it takes great courage to be leaders and stand up for what’s right, even when it makes others uncomfortable.

During their debate yesterday, African-American Senators Gill and Cunningham, both female, invoked legendary civil rights issues. At one point during her comments, Gill said that without the courage of past legislatures to enact widespread civil rights laws like universal suffrage and the like - “we would not be here [in this room] today.” Later, Cunningham respectfully disagreed, saying, “we would be here, but we’d be sweeping the floor.”

Shame on Senator Shirley Turner, for having such a short memory.

I’m sorry if the idea of same-sex marriage makes you uncomfortable. I’m sorry for you, might be the better way to phrase it. The world is evolving.



There are many more facets to this issue, but if I wrote on all of them this post would be way longer than I intended it. I may add things here over the next few days or write additional posts on the topic all together.

If you have any comments, I encourage you to post them as long as they are civilized. This blog is a dictatorship, not a democracy – so please be respectful.

NOLA-bound and determined.

Resolutions be damned!

Alright, alright, alright! All the morning TV this week has been talking about “new year, new you” – now, I’ve established that I’m not the girl who believes in new year’s resolutions.. Resolutions are made to be broken, in my opinion and experience. But it’s okay if you do the whole resolution thing because, let’s face it: this is a time of renewal whether it be cosmic, earthly, physiological or just calendar-y.

The excitement of the holidays is fading away but the results of two weeks of starchy, fatty foods, sugary treats and mass alcohol consumption is the gift that keeps on giving.. and the smaller jeans I managed to squeeze into back in October are not feeling that great right now. It’s been easy for me in the past to just remain in this self-induced coma well into March.. Maybe it was because in Upstate NY you face the grim, gray reality that winter actively lasts this long.. but I’m not in Albany anymore. So, no - not this time, not this year, not this decade.

Work to do.

I have some fitness goals this year, some might seem simple to many.. such as being able to do ten proper pushups and ten proper pull ups. Confession: I’ve never been able to do an actual pull up. In those presidential fitness tests back in the day, the gym teacher just let me do an arm hang and I held on for maybe 2 seconds. While I was strong like bull and played sports in high school, I’ve always just felt bad about my lack of physical fitness and ran away from the challenge instead of working towards improvement. It was the only running I did.

Some of my other goals are a touch more complex. It’s no secret or surprise that I want to train for the bike so that I can ride a century and finish strong.. but how? While I’ve got some things planned for the gym that will build strength and endurance – I won’t bore you with the details. Not yet anyway.


The other night I committed to the Pound for Pound Challenge sponsored by the Biggest Loser. My goal is to lose 40lbs by their deadline of June 30th. It’s totally do-able and will certainly help me with everything I aim to accomplish. But let it be said: I’m very good at procrastination. I excel at it actually! The idea of going to the gym for generic weight-loss or to train for a far-off ride (we’re looking at autumn here) is not very enticing. I don’t have the gear or motivation necessary for cold-weather rides - not to mention the thought of dodging discarded Christmas trees and piles of leaves which still litter street shoulders also leaves something to be desired.

Valentine’s Day

So, how do I motivate myself to work towards all these goals I’ve set when it’s so much easier during these early winter months of 2010 to just stay cozy and occupied with other stuff? That’s the hard part about setting goals and resolutions – it’s easy to lose steam after a few weeks or even a few days of gung-ho excitement. Instead I want to focus on breaking off chunks – setting smaller goals which are attainable where I can see success and work to stay on track.

The next big event I’m looking forward to is a trip to New Orleans for Mardi Gras with a few of my best friends. This is a vacation to which we are all looking forward. It’s my third voyage to the Big Easy but my first as a rider. While it’s optimal to explore the French Quarter on foot, I thought about seeing the city from two-wheels. The time we’re there includes Valentine’s Day, which falls on a Sunday this year, and I had the instant spark of celebrating two great loves in my life with a long ride in NOLA.

I found, via Google, the New Orleans Bicycle Club. NOBC looks serious. They’re racers and what not, but I contacted one of the members via Facebook (isn't technology amazing?) and told him of my designs. He replied right away and gave me some thoughts to chew on regarding routes and other considerations.

Now I have work to do and decisions to make but I’m so psyched. This dovetails nicely with my goals because I want to be in good enough shape to experience and enjoy a 30-40 mile ride right smack in the middle of an already kick-ass vacation. Our trip is only five weeks away and this gives me something to look forward to besides eating amazing food in a city I’ve come to love.

I’ll leave it at this: this light bulb moment has found me both motivated and excited! I simply cannot wait to get going.


“incantation replaced resolution and we vowed to allow each perfection that we could be”
~from ‘red letter year’ by ani difranco

A Long December..

I haven’t written in a while. And for me, it’s kind of like exercise – once you take a little time off, it gets harder and harder to start it up again. But instead of feeling guilty or bad or whatever that I haven’t written, I should just do it. I know, I know…

I’m happy to report that the solstice has just passed (the true reason for the season, in my book) and that means that the universe is adding precious minutes of light each day. Thanks universe! I haven’t ridden my bike in way too long – since early November – and right now it’s parked out in the back shed, and for this I try not to feel guilty.. but that’s the way that one goes.

My household has been crazy. Both of my readers (haha) know that my dad fell in early November and broke his leg – he fractured the top of his femur where the bone goes into the hip socket. He had to have surgery and was in a rehab hospital for three weeks. He’s home now, and for this we are glad – he has very limited mobility and I have accepted that helping to take care of him has become my full time job. I resisted this for a while but now it just is the way it is. I wish on more than one level that it wasn’t.. but wishes don’t go to the pharmacy or dole out medication. Wishes don't go to the grocery store or make lunch. Nor do they hold hands. My father told me that he was sorry that I had to do this for him, but I told him not to be sorry because there is no one else in the world that I would rather help in this fashion. And that happens to be the truth.

Today my best friend from high school, Malinda, came to visit. She brought her two beautiful girls and we hung out for a few hours. It was great. I miss her so much. She and John made beautiful babies.

When they were getting ready to leave, I brought Gwen – the newborn – in to my father so he could say good bye. I looked at her perfect little baby feet and toes and looked up at my dad and thought to myself for a moment about what people call the circle of life. I know, it might be corny to read about.. even the fact that I’m committing these words to the page in this manner.. but I felt it. And at the same moment I felt what I can only describe as a crush. No, not the kind of crush that you get on someone you like, when you can’t talk to that certain someone let alone make eye contact - but rather as a crush of life.. the feeling is like experiencing great sorrow and joy and fear and love simultaneously. Even now, hours later, makes my head throb and my heart ache.

I’ve been freelancing for the past few months, which is neat. I’m writing for a publisher that prints a handful of monthly community news papers. Not ironically, it was my father and his illness that precipitated such events. As you might recall we went on a blimp ride in September and that’s how I met my editor. I was thrilled that my father and I shared the front page of that issue – his picture and the story about the blimp ride, and my first professional byline in NJ, just to the right of him. This is special to us. I’ve been working hard to do what I need to do around the house and write a few stories each month. It hasn’t been easy, but I’m trying.

At the end of every year since the Counting Crows produced Recovering the Satellites, I have placed special significance to the song "A Long December" - and believe me, it will be a Facebook status update at some point over these next waning days of 2009, because that’s how I do. This year, I attach the same meaning to it. All in all, 2009 wasn’t terrible for me. Yes, it had a few, short terrible moments like every year does.. but it was filled with good stuff as well. Moving back was hard but necessary. Leaving my friends and the life I built in Albany could only be made better by returning home and rekindling some old friendships that were placed on a shelf for a very long time as well as meeting some new people who I have already come to cherish. This trade off was capped by honoring my responsibility to my family because in return, I’ve learned so much more about my father and also myself.

Sure, I lost the dream job in Philly. That ranks up there in the top three shitty moments of 2009. I was bitter and self-deprecating about that for a while, but I’ve decided to look a little deeper beneath the surface. It was an incredible experience and opportunity, but it just wasn’t meant to be. I am very proud of the fact that the day I lost the job, I still pitched a story I was working on for their cover and they took it. This simple fact reminds me of my resilience, determination and drive.

In all of its’ gloom, I’ve realized that I am actually lucky to have had this opportunity to take care of my dad because so few people get to spend so much time with a parent who has a terminal illness. The value of the comfort I have been able to provide to both my father and my mother in this time cannot ever be matched by business cards, bylines or newspaper clippings. Period. I’ve embraced this path on which the universe has me set.

2010 is filled with uncertainty, perhaps amplified by events which took place in 2009, but there are a few things that I know.. I’ve learned a lot about myself this year. I’ve learned a lot about my strength and compassion. I’ve learned a lot about my own corporeal body and what I can push it to accomplish. I’ve learned about friendships which endure tests of time and distance. I’ve learned about life and death and what it means to truly love – both others and myself.

Over the course of Earth’s next solar orbit, I have some goals I would like to accomplish. I will not list them all here because I do not believe in resolutions but they include things like renewing travel plans with my nearest and dearest, starting (and hopefully finishing) my first book, completing a century ride on the bike (and finishing as strong as I start), and beginning a cancer fundraising campaign. Maybe I’ll even find love in there somewhere. It could happen.

My wish for you - both of you who might find time to read this - is that you give yourself the gift of time to reflect on the world around you, understand the bonds of commonality that should serve to bring us together instead of pull us apart, and realize the potential of what you have in your heart. Because life and death are beautiful - even if the former lacks the consistency of the latter.

This year may be drawing to an end, but the great cosmic cycle is pushing forward and once again adding minutes of precious daylight, tick by tick.

Thank you for reading and best wishes for a great next decade!

Pedalin’ through the Punkin' Patch…

Last Sunday morning, I woke up and stretched my legs to see how they felt after my ride and subsequent fall the previous day. My knees didn’t hurt that badly and there was no ache in my quads – all good signs. I checked out the grossness that had developed on my left knee, applied some anti-grossness ointment and band-aids and it was game on.

This particular Sunday, October 4th, was a long time coming. I decided in August that I wanted to set an end-of-season goal ride for myself, and SIBA's Pumpkin Patch Pedal was it..

The drive to Jamesburg was filled with pounding music, butterflies flittering in my gut and things to remember – like that this is a ride, not a race and most of all, the importance of stretching. I’m used to just kind of jumping on the bike and going, but considering both my fall the day before and the distance which was laid out in front of me, stretching would be important.

I was excited as I pulled into Thompson Park and finally found a parking spot – the place was packed with hundreds of cars and riders of every shape and stripe. There were the serious looking guys with fancy carbon road bikes and matching outfits.. all the way down to middle aged ladies and families with children on mountain bikes.

I signed in, got my goodie bag which includes this here coveted long-sleeve shirt, a water bottle (which will never be used for actual drinking water because it’s not BPA-free), a yellow paper bracelet which indicated that I purchased a post-ride turkey sub and my cue sheet.

This cue sheet will later become the infamous device which added an hour and eight or ten extra miles to the ride. Don’t worry, I’ll explain shortly.

You couldn’t have asked for nicer conditions. It was 72 degrees with sunny blue skies marbled with cotton. This day was perfection. My mom used to work around this area so I was familiar with the first stretch of the course. I remember going to work with her when I was a kid and always loving this one stretch road where sunlight shone through trees and mottled the pavement. I smiled to myself, remembering childhood, as I rode it.

I’ve gotten used to riding alone, I actually enjoy it most of the time. Maybe it’s an only child thing, but I think the individuality of this sport is one of the things that has drawn me so heavily to riding. Sometimes I ride with my friend’s husband, but that’s only happened a few times this season. So, you can imagine my pleasant surprise when about 12 miles into the course, one woman with road bike and fancy jersey and all, said that she lost her partner somewhere and she would ride with me for a while.

Sharon was the only black person I saw on the entire ride, and she was freakin' awesome. She’s a special education teacher for the Philadelphia public school system. “God bless ya,” I said. We rode side-by-side and chatted through Millstone and Upper Freehold, while I had the ability to chat anyway, before the hills came.

After that, this is the view I had of her most of the time.

She made me feel good because most of the time people don’t talk to me on the road. Ya see, I’m on a hybrid bike (looks like a road bike and a mountain bike had a baby) and although I am the new owner of fancy-pants bike shorts, I don’t have one of those special jerseys and wear New Balances instead of clip-system bike shoes. Please, this sport is expensive enough, one step at a time, thanks!

Sharon told me that she did her first century ride on a hybrid. This made me very happy.

Somewhere aftercrossing Route 537, Sharon dropped me. My legs were aching – not even my knees, but my legs. The churn was slowing and I realized just how dumb it was for me to have gone on the ride with Heath the day before. And there were hills. Whoever said this ride was “flat as a board” should punch themselves in the face. They weren’t terrible hills, but my muscles were just too fatigued. I did keep it going though.. even if it was embarrassingly slow.

I made it to which would turn out to be the only rest stop, 25 miles into the course, in about two hours. This was in New Egypt, but the sign said Plumsted. I need a proper map to tell the difference. Sharon was there, smiling at me when I arrived. Her partner (I don't think she's a gay, the other lady was just a riding partner) was there waiting for her. I shoved some bagel wedges into my mouth, washed them down with Gatorade, refilled my camelbak and was off again. Sharon asked if I wanted to ride with them. I said, “I’m sure ya’ll be passing me soon, this way I get a head start.”

It’s true. Sharon came and went in the hills on the way back.
This ride went through some gorgeous central Jersey farmland. I took some random snaps as I passsed by. I want to point out that ironically, I did not see one single pumpkin patch. The farmland looked something like this.


So, I signed up for the 50 mile ride (called a half-century in those circles). The cue sheet showed it was 53.4 miles but in reality, I rode 61.5. Why, you ask? Because one of the turns on the cue sheet was shittily marked. Short answer is we (Sharon, myself and this other guy Larry) all made a right when we should’ve made a left. It wasn’t until we got to Route 537 again that I was like, no, there is something wrong here. We had already crossed this road twice and since we were on our way back north, we shouldn’t be crossing it again. We turned around and headed back up. I say up, because there were many hills involved here, which added to be being pissed off about the situation.

When we got back up to that spot where we zigged instead of zagged, there were about 15 other riders on cell phones trying to figure out the right way to go – so it wasn’t just us. I bitched to the people at SIBA (Staten Island Bicycle Association) about this later. It added something like an extra 9 miles, and about an hour, onto my ride. And though I was sporting fancy pants bike shorts, they only delayed the inevitable ass-to-cheese-grater feeling. Also, due to their crappy directions, the next/last rest stop for the half-century was closed by the time we got there.

I pounded a Powerbar on the side of the road while watching purdy horses on some course. This was mile 41 on the cue sheet but 51 in real life, and I just needed to give my butt a rest for a minute.

The remainder of the ride was mostly mine in solitude. I kept playing leap frog with two ladies who were maybe in their 50’s. They were nice. My legs were moving slowly, my quads screamed at me for not resting the day before and my ass was absolutely killing me. Luckily the weather was amazing.

I realized as I got closer and closer to Thompson Park where my day started, that due to the cue sheet error, I had already accomplished my goal, now I just needed to finish and it didn’t matter how slow I was.

I pulled into the park and I couldn’t believe I had actually done it. Five hours and fifty-three seconds (5:00:53) after the start, I finished. I didn’t crash. My spokes didn’t fly off the wheel like shrapnel-y needles. I just finished. I rolled up to the gazebo where they were handing out the post-ride Subway lunch (my friends know that I will cut a bitch for a turkey sub) and saw Sharon, her ride partner Carol, and Larry all sitting on benches. They smiled and congratulated me on finishing my first ride. Sharon clapped as took off my helmet, before I limped over to the gazebo. I realized it was first time I looked at any of their full faces, sans helmets and sunglasses. I will never forget them.

Two dudes played acoustic guitar next to the gazebo. They played songs that seemed cliché but made me smile while I was horking down my turkey sub. At the moment, song titles escape me, but they played stuff like “Ramblin Man” and “On the Road Again”. If I could muster the energy to walk, I would’ve requested “Life is a Highway."

This was my first organized ride and for me it meant more than that – it was like a rite of passage. Next time, and yes, there will be a next time I’ll plan things out differently so that I can finish just as strong as I start.

Maybe next year I’ll do the century. Yeah. Goals we set are goals we get.

Broke as a spoke.

My spoke broke.

Again.

It’s the second time in a week that my bike is in the shop for the problem and frankly it pissed me off when it happened. The big ride that I’ve been planning is eight days away, and I feel like I need to be out as much as possible to prepare for it. Luckily I was heading to the gym only a few minutes from home and not up in Lambertville or Bulls Island or something ridiculous when it popped. I can change a tire on the side of the road, but that’s about the limit of my mechanical expertise at the moment.

At any rate, I called the shop – Bike King in Morrisville, PA – they remembered me, my bike and told me to bring it on in. They’re going to replace all the spokes on that wheel to make sure the problem doesn’t continue – which is cool by me.

So while I’m at the shop, I ask the guys about bike shorts. I hate to say it,
but I need to invest in ‘em. I’ve been wearing regular mesh shorts all summer, and even a 20 mile ride makes me hate my life. Ya see, bike shorts aren’t just about looking homosexual in lycra and spandexor the aerodynamics of such a snug-fit – hence these loose-style shorts which are a favorite of mountain bikers and casual riders. No, bike shorts are a necessary piece of equipment because of the chamois – or for lack of a better description, ass-and-crotch-padding.

I ask the shaggy-haired guy behind the counter if there is actually a difference between mens’ shorts and womens’ shorts. He laughed and said yes, adding with a smile, “we are different down there you know.”

Yes. I know. I’ve read about that. In books. And sometimes when boys and girls really like each other, they give each other special hugs. I digress.

Shaggy, all joking aside, took the time to actually show me the difference. In the shorts, I mean.

Wait.. None of this sounds right.

He took a pair of mens’ short and a pair of womens’ short, flipped ‘em inside out to show how different they are and why. Other than obvious differences in junk and plumbing, even our bones themselves are dissimilar – the pelvis or “sit-bone” is wider on women (for child birthin’ purposes) so the padding is shaped differently (wider, of course) for that reason alone. And anyone who has ridden a bike ten miles or more understands why that’s important. Not to mention cases of sexual dysfunction in some serious male and female riders.

By the way, the chamois on most of those baggy MTB-style shorts is gender-neutral - meaning they have largely the same padding regardless of mens' or womens'. I’m thinking that I need to be nice to my body and invest in a decent pair of shorts. And be prepared to spend $60 on even the low-end. Pun unintended.

Sometimes it’s hard for a girl with my figure to muster the lady balls - aka “thatchers” – to walk into a bike shop, let alone talk about clingy apparel with dudes. You might call me fat. doughy. pudgy. thick. or cylindrical – like a Pringles can (my very favorite self-descriptor). So, you can imagine the looks someone like me gets upon entering some shops – like what the hell is that girl doing here? And if I’ve never been in that shop before, I stand there sort of dumb-founded, wondering the same thing. I’m usually only browsing anyway, on account of being broke, so I just look at all the cool stuff I would want to buy if I could afford it or if my body-type and skill-level warranted such a purchase. But my guys? Shaggy, et al? They made me feel at home right away.

Bike King is a small shop. They don’t have huge rooms full of stock that you can get lost in – but what they do have, is excellent customer service. They proved that to me when I was shopping around for my ride, and they continue to prove that to me on the regular. That’s why they’ll be my go-to-guys for any mechanical issues I have. On the bike, that is.

In unrelated news: I’ve started freelancing, so that’s one reason for my sporadic posts recently. Working is good, especially if someone is gonna give you a few bucks for your effort. Dad is hanging in there, he’s on a new chemo regemin which is kicking his ass, but we’re not going to talk about that at the moment. Also, we have a video from the blimp ride which will be posted soon, just some last editing touches to do. And finally, I have a couple blog posts which are just itching to be written: one about Vick and the other about, shockingly enough, cycling.

And on that note, I was just informed that my baby is repaired and road-ready. So I gotta go. I have a ride to prepare for.

WMC: Can you Harvey Milk me, Focker?

Wednesday Mail Call!

When Cleve Jones woke up this morning, he had no idea he'd be penning a guest spot on the DIP. And he still doesn't know. I plucked this little dumpling as a repost from the mail bag for empowerments and edumacations.

Dear Catherine --


It has been over 30 years since my friend and teacher, gay rights activist Harvey Milk, was assassinated. Today, lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people have won limited rights in a handful of states, but we are still second class citizens throughout the United States.

Harvey once said, "It takes no compromising to give people their rights."

This morning, Representative Jerrold Nadler, (D-NY) introduced a bill in Congress to repeal the so-called "Defense of Marriage Act" that bans same-sex marriages from being recognized in other states.

If passed by the Congress, the Respect Marriage Act would be a significant step forward in the march for full equality.

Join the Courage Campaign and Equality Across America and send a message to your Congressmember urging them to co-sponsor the Respect Marriage Act and to keep marching forward towards full equality for LGBTs.


Equal rights are not a "gay" issue. They are about our shared human rights: safety in our schools and jobs, equitable healthcare and housing, and protection for our families, to name a few.

Like all other Americans, LGBT people are guaranteed equal protection, but are currently denied it by Congress. Repealing DOMA is just a first step. Free and equal people do not compromise. That's why Equality Across America, the organization I founded, is marching on Washington October 11-12 with one simple demand: Equal protection for LGBT people in all matters governed by civil law in all 50 states. Now.

Please ask your Congressmember to co-sponsor the Respect Marriage Act as an important first step, and remind them that there are no fractions of equality.

When Harvey spoke at Gay Freedom Day at San Francisco City Hall in 1978, he invoked the words of the Declaration of Independence: "All [people] are created equal. No matter how hard you try, you can never erase those words."

No more compromises. We are equal.

Cleve Jones
Senior Advisor, Courage Campaign

P.S.: I am proud to announce that the Courage Campaign will be running a Camp Courage for hundreds of participants during the March on Washington. The only way we win full equality is by organizing in our own communities and Camp Courage will send the marchers home as empowered organizers who will continue to fight for full equality.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Courage Campaign is an online organizing network that empowers more than 700,000 grassroots and netroots supporters to push for progressive change and full equality in California.

PUBLIC OPTION NOW!

Wednesday night I watched the President Obama address a joint session of Congress to discuss his ideal healthcare reform bill. I watched with embarrassment while someone on the other side of the political spectrum called him a liar, and reminisced about the old days when no one called out President Bush for being a colossal liar that got 5,000 brave men and women killed in an unnecessary military venture. Ahhh, them were the days, but I digress.

See, I watched because I’m invested in this healthcare thing. It means something to me and it should mean something to you too.

There are three main facets to the Obama plan. Consumer protection , a marketplace exchange and requirement for everyone to carry health insurance like some states require every driver to carry auto insurance.

Do I like the idea of being mandated to carry health insurance? No. I’ve always been the kind of girl who when you tell me I have to do something, that’s the last thing I want to so. It’s not a non-confirmist thing, it’s being compelled that usually bothers me. But in this case things are different. See, I WANT health coverage. I need it. Not like the people in the video below - thank god – I’m lucky enough that despite being a self-proclaimed beefy lady, I’m actually in pretty good health. For this I am thankful.



But all that could change if you’re one of the uninsured and you don’t need a duly elected president to remind you that you’re only one accident or illness away from bankruptcy. Ask my friend from Upstate NY, a Lymes disease patient, who chooses between meds and rent. Ask my friend from Central Jersey, a single mother of two with a family history of heart problems – she’s in collections for an $800 EKG. You think she needs the stress of bill collectors calling for a routine preventative procedure or test? Yeah, that’s great for her heart but in reality it's only a drop in the ocean.

These are just two examples of people what I know who are falling down this rabbit hole. I’m sure I know more if I dig further. I’m sure you know someone who isn’t a deadbeat but has to face this medical insurance madness every day.

One of the great ironies of the health care crisis for me personally has been the rhetoric or “debate.” As someone with a degree in political science, I’ve always had an appreciation (even if sometimes disdain) for the political process and now – at one of the most important times for millions upon millions of uninsured Americans – the dialogue has been hijacked by our own extremists who would rather rip this debate to shreds than find the common ground we need to forge meaningful change. It makes me sick, pun unintended.

If you take the president at his word, he won’t sign any program that will add a dime to the deficit – and let’s face it, it’s not like the previous administration ever cared about that. If it was up to them, they would’ve privatized social security and fed it to the stock market. Yeah, that woulda been cute. I digress.

Personally, I’m in favor of adding the public option to the insurance “exchange” that is being discussed. I just don’t believe that the collective bargaining power of the uninsured will be strong enough to achieve affordable plans without the public option. It will foster competition for insurance companies which will help the individual consumer within that market place. Also, if I’m paying into the system, I’d rather not have that system spend money on advertising and crap that has the company logo on it for giveaways. I don’t need all that garbage, I’d rather have the money go to good doctors who can help keep me healthy.

I also believe that affordable coverage for the individual consumer would spur entrepreneurialism – people just might feel more comfortable starting their own business or going to work for a small business (an independent spirit our country was founded in). Think about it. Americans would be able to pursue their true talents as opposed to finding some corporate machine job that they are interested in based on access to benefits alone. There’s nothing wrong with that if that’s what you want, but if you’re me, having the option to do something different (and still feel safe and secure about it) is a good thing.

That’s why I support the public option and emailed my three representatives in Congress and the White House urging them to stand fast on this piece of the healthcare reform puzzle. I urge you to think about this rationally and make a little bit of constructive noise. I urge you to email your representatives. They need to know where you stand on this (even if it’s not with me). If you’re not sure who your Congressional representatives are click here for House and click here for the Senate. I can see how the House might be confusing, but you really should know who your Senators are.. and they’re the ones that need to hear from you the most.

After the President’s speech I turned on Comedy Central. I’d like to say that I needed something lighthearted to concentrate on after that very emotional and stirring address, but it’s actually just what’s usually on in my room.

Chris Rock’s 1999 comedy special Bigger and Blacker was on, and at one point he said, ”you better have some medical insurance or you gonna die.” It’s not funny, precisely because it’s true. I’ve been saying something sadly like it for years. People without health insurance go bankrupt or just die.

Seriously. Doing nothing or falling back on half-assed reforms will cost more in both money and lives than you can even imagine. And there is no amount of Robitussin that Chris Rock’s dad can pour on this one to fix things.



If you’d like to read more about comprehensive health reform, click here. I have no intention of finding the lame GOP-friendly sites who would like nothing better than to torpedo reform and maintain the status quo. Frankly, because they’ve sucked up enough of our attention.

It’s simple mantra that I’d like for you to repeat: A healthy America is a strong America.

Did you hear that? A healthy America is a strong America.

Seems like it would make sense, doesn’t it?

Does this blimp make my ass look fat?

Today, the Caperello family got the chance to share something totally unique – a ride on an airship. A blimp. It was freakin’ awesome.

The event, a birthday celebration for cancer survivors explained in my last post, was put on by the American Cancer Society (the official sponsor of birthdays) and Horizon Blue Cross & Blue Shield. My mom who works for ACS got an email from the event coordinator that some media would be present and wanted to interview my dad. The Ewing Observer is a local, monthly paper – the most recent edition came out yesterday, so it’ll be a while before we can read their account of today's happenings.

I said,"They want to interview you! That’s pretty cool, huh Pops?" His response was nonchalant.

“I’ll answer any questions they have," he said, "but I want them to know that every American deserves healthcare.”

Yes. My pop’s initial reaction was to use the publicity as a pulpit for the healthcare crisis. We wore matching red t-shirts that read, The healthcare crisis is a cancer crisis on one side and Make health insurance adequate, affordable, available, administratively simple on the other side.

I’m not entirely sure where Horizon stands on healthcare reform, but the reps there at Solebury Airfield couldn’t have been nicer. We won't see the article for some time to know if dad got his message out, but at a certain moment, it was all about the blimp, baby.

And that moment was right about here:


That's dad in the red.
Captain Terry (seen below) dropped some knowledge on me n moms while they had dad in the air with the reporter from the Ewing Observer.


Fun facts:

• There are 22 airships in the world, 3 are owned by Goodyear

• There is $50,000 worth of helium in that thar blimp

• This blimp has 2 pilots and a crew of 11 (Terry had the morning shift, so his partner or “line pilot” I believe he was called, is at the helm with my pops)

• Blimps don’t do snow or ice. After Sept 13 it’s going to its’ home in North Carolina. At 25 mph it takes about 12 hours to get where they have to go. I wouldn’t mind going for that ride if it was during the day and I had an appropriate amount of beer or scotch.

• On a scale of 1-10, ten being perfect – Terry rated today’s weather of 82-degrees and clear blue skies as an 11.

After a ten-minute ride they circled back to drop off the reporter (Diccon Hyatt is actually the community editor, but I digress) and pick up mom and myself.

I took an embarrassing amount of photos – the whole album will be up on Facebook shortly, but here are some of my favorites:


Pre-flight interview.


Maybe you can tell, maybe you can't - but the level of excitement is off the charts!


Momma & me: excited and nervous.


That's a propeller spinning around. It sounded like a mega-souped-up lawn mower.


The pilot steers the rudders with wheels on each side of his seat which makes him look a little like Joe from Family Guy. He doesn't look like he's going anywhere, but in fact, he is.


Two of my favorites: Round Valley Resevoir and Spruce Run in the distance.


The center gauge on the top row says we're at 1300 feet - the pilot says it's the perfect altitude for sight-seeing.


Airfield wildflowers.


Coming in for a landing!


Terra firma.

The wind was a little disconcerting. You could feel the airship being pushed by strong gusts. I've been parasailing before, but it's an entirely different effect. The feeling of lightly propelled floating at that altitude is unmatched.

Here is the bio of my dad that he and I wrote at ACS’ request:


Frank is 62 and has spent over 40 years working as an IT professional – and is very excited about this blimp ride! He loves the idea of simply being able to float above the Earth and look down. In a hot air balloon, he says, you’re at the mercy of the wind and might not be able to see something you’d like to, but in a blimp you have directionality in where you float. Airplanes move too fast at low levels to see anything and at higher altitudes, you can’t see anything because it’s too far away. He just thinks it would be a really neat thing to experience.

Frank has been fighting stage four metastatic pancreatic cancer since fall of 2007. It has been a tough journey thus far, but with total support from his family and friends, he refuses to give in and is hunkered down for the long haul. He’s also impressed by the spirit of those he has encountered at his various doctor’s offices and even his local pharmacy; finding that healthcare professionals and the people working with them have been extremely caring and loving individuals.

Frank is proud that the American Cancer Society the sponsor of his next birthday, October 8.


Yeah, my pops wasn’t just excited – he was thrilled. It felt so good to see that smile on his face.


That's our shadow, man. Far out.

By popular demand (I've always wanted to say that), you can click here to see the entire photo album.

Things I’m excited about this fall for $400, Alex.

Well this has been an interesting and exciting summer in more than a few ways. A quick round up reminds me of turning 30 with some of my best friends in Baltimore, going camping in the Catskills and visiting some great peeps in Albany, taking control of my life using Livestrong, volunteering for the LS Challenge in Philly, getting a new kick-ass bike and using it to push my limits and explore this area of the Jerz, making some new friends and getting to spend a bunch of time with my dad – helping to take care of him and such.

But the arrival of September, while it signals summer is drawing to a close, does not mean that the fun stops there. Oh no, there is a whole lot going on this autumn and they fall into two general categories:

Gear and Rides:


This is a Camelbak hydration system. It’s a fancy backpack that holds 100 oz of water. It would have been very useful while I was out riding on 95 degree days and stealing water from garden hoses in the mountains. But that’s ok, I have it now, and not only is it way more comfy than the bag I’ve been using, but it’s also in this color called “cheddar” (mmm, cheese)which will help people see me and is perfect for leaf peeping and hunting seasons. No, I don’t hunt, but I don’t want to be mistaken for a large, huntable animal out on the trails either. It could happen.


This is a bar-map. It is basically a piece of plastic that holds maps and route instructions, and velcros to your handlebars. You may be asking, Catherine, don’t you have a GPS? Yes, I do, but I am a cartography nerd and this way I can plan my exact route without “the bitch” (that’s why I call the GPS voice) telling me the fastest route by car, which is not necessarily the best or safest route by bicycle.

I have one more piece of gear that is shipping to me today called a RoadID. It’s an ID tag that fastens onto a bracelet, anklet, shoe lace or you can get it as military-style dog tags. My mom is always very worried about me when I go out for hours on end, which is understandable, and this little item will identify me in an emergency even if my cell phone is busted and my driver’s license is lost or stolen. While the people at Road ID slacked a little on a specific customer service request, they did send me an online coupon for me to provide to my friends, undoubtedly with hopes to boost their sales, but it’s a purchase to consider if you’re the active or outdoorsy-type. Coupon Number: ThanksCatherine534854. This coupon is good for $1 off any Road ID order. It can be used up to 20 times in the next 30 days, so get crackin'.

I can’t wait to get all this stuff together and go for my next long ride (tomorrow, perhaps?) because I’m training for a 50 mile ride (aka half-century) to take place on Oct. 4. It’s called the Pumpkin Patch Pedal and winds through some of the most beautiful farmland in central Jersey. I’m excited. It was a goal I set in the back of my head for July and I’m feeling pretty good about it. Hope the weather and my knees all cooperate.

No, not everything on this post will be about my bike.

Fun times:

In addition to things I love every fall like leaf peeping (which will definitely be enhanced by long descents down winding roads or trails) and pumpkin hunting and carving, I’m also looking forward to camping. I’ll be going with one of my best friends, her husband and two kids – I’m looking for a place that I went to years ago that has a haunted hay ride for the youngins, they should like that.

Last year I enjoyed some mid-October camping in the Catskills for another best friend’s 29th birthday. I think autumn camping is my favorite because of the colors, the ability to comfortably wear hoodies all day long, you don’t wake up sweating in your tent in the morning and the beer stays colder longer while sitting around the fire. It sure does get cold though if you’re tenting alone, that’s why I cuddle with rocks from the outside of the campfire ring. It does the trick, trust me. This year Shan is turning 30 and while I secretly hope she will choose camping again this year, I can’t wait to see whatever hijinx and shenanigans she decides on.

Also, I am ready for some football!! Hell, I’m already enjoying some preseason games, but I cannot wait for Week 1. I’m an Eagles fan, and I’ve got some thoughts on the whole Michael Vick thing – but I’m not getting into it now. Perhaps later this week.

Lastly, and most immediate, is Thursday’s blimp ride. Yeah, you heard me: blimp ride. The American Cancer Society is having a birthday party for cancer survivors this week, and included in the festivities is the option to take a ride on the Horizon blimp. Although my dad is a Libra, he gets to partake in these festivities. And he is soo excited! We’re all really looking forward to it. I’ll write about that and include some pictures at the end of the week also.

So, for the most part, that’s that. Of course I’m looking forward to spending time with the people I care about most as well as getting to know some of the new people I’ve met recently, and now that cooler weather is here, I’m gonna be making more soups and stuff – which reminds me, the stuff on the stove should be ready right about now.

It’s always bitter-sweet to see summer go, but what are you looking forward to?